


i’ll be with you from dusk till dawn (baby i’ll be right here)

by wafflehearts



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: And violence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Peraltiago, amy has a panic attack, amy is okay now, mentions of physical abuse, rosa is mentioned, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:34:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26478043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wafflehearts/pseuds/wafflehearts
Summary: Jake knows he shouldn’t pry, he shouldn’t push her, but now he’s scared and desperate to find out. He needs to know.“Ames,” he says, standing up from their bed. He reaches out to touch her lightly on the arm, and he sees panic and fright in her eyes when she swivels. He recoils, shocked, and that’s when the first wave hits her.
Relationships: Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago
Kudos: 60





	i’ll be with you from dusk till dawn (baby i’ll be right here)

**Author's Note:**

> title lyrics from dusk till dawn by zayn and sia

He knows something’s wrong from the moment she walks into their bedroom. Her bun tighter than usual, her face pale and drained and the way she avoids his eyes. At first he just suspects it’s the stress from work.

“Hey Ames,” he says, worry etched onto his brow. “Is everything okay?”

She flashes him a tight smile and nods, quickly turning her attention back to her clothes.

He frowns and asks again. Same response. But he sees through her, sees that she’s more uptight and tense than usual.

“Amy,” he tries again, but before he can say anything else she’s already turned around and reassured him that she’s okay.

So he lets it go. He lets her do her own thing. But then he hears it. The rapid breathing. The occasional whimpers.

Jake knows he shouldn’t pry, he shouldn’t push her, but now he’s scared and desperate to find out. He needs to know.

“Ames,” he says, standing up from their bed. He reaches out to touch her lightly on the arm, and he sees panic and fright in her eyes when she swivels. He recoils, shocked, and that’s when the first wave hits her.

——

_She’s kneeling besides the bed. Cowering. Terrified of what’s above her. She fucked up. She stayed later than she should’ve. And now she’s going to receive her punishment._

She looks up with a gasp and there he is. Furious, seething. There’s a whip in his hand, and she feels the panic start to rise in her chest.

“No,” she chokes out, covering her head with her arms. “Please don’t,” she cries. Her breathing becomes more and more shallow, rapid. She struggles to catch her breath. Everything is spinning and spinning and her brain can’t keep up. Her body can’t cope.

Then she collapses. She leans onto the bed for dear life, looking for something, _anything,_ to grasp. To hold on to. She can’t hear anything anymore. There’s a sharp ringing in her head and it’s getting louder and louder until it’s too much for her to bear.

The panic is a deluge of ice water surrounding every limb, creeping higher until it passes her mouth and nose. She feels like she’s drowning. 

She can’t breathe. She needs air. Desperately.

Everything is a blur. His cruel laughter echoes in her head and she scrambles to protect herself. Then his arms are around her tightly and she starts to choke and something in her breaks completely. She screams and she kicks until she’s free again. Tears are streaming down her face now and she hugs herself tightly, rocking back and forth.

“Amy.”

She shakes her head firmly and buries her face into her knees.

“Amy. Please look at me.”

Her body is shaking uncontrollably and racked with sobs.

“No,” she cries to herself quietly. “Please don’t.” She’s still shaking her head, but the fight has left her voice. She raises her head timidly, expecting to see _him_ , but it’s Jake.

“Jake?” she asks uncertainly, her voice wavering as she struggles to stand up. She sees him give a small smile and reach out- but then Jake’s gone. _And he’s back._

“No!” she screams, dropping back to her knees. The panic’s back, stronger than ever, and she feels it overtake her. Her heart is hammering in her chest, her tears staining her clothes. 

She’s trapped. She’s confined, as if all the oxygen has been sucked out of her lungs. Out of the corner of her eye she sees him raise the whip and she braces herself, ready for anything that’s about to come her way and-

_Jake._

It’s Jake. _Jake._ Reality starts to separate from imagination and the non-existent figure disappears. Amy lets out a shaky breath as she looks around the familiar room. She sees the faint glow of the city lights outside their window, the capacious wooden closet half open, clothes draped carelessly. She looks down and sees her bed. _Their_ bed. Her hand is still trembling slightly and she hugs herself close, reminding herself that she is home. She is secure. She is _safe._

And then she looks up and there is Jake. She can see his eyes glistening brightly, his upper lip trembling as he struggles to control himself. His breathing is fast and rapid, and what Amy doesn’t know is that he’s longing to hold her in his arms, to calm her, to whisper comforting words to her.

But he keeps his distance. He gives her time. He gives her space. He’s patient, waiting for her to slowly calm herself down. He doesn’t ask, doesn’t pry. He just sits there, across from her, knowing that his presence itself will calm her eventually. He hopes she realizes that she’s safe. That nothing is going to harm her. (And she does).

  
Eventually she starts talking.

“I went to the bar with Rosa today. We had just closed a huge case, and we were celebrating. I had gotten a few shots, and was slightly tipsy. We were on the dance floor, and-“ she stops to let out a small sob.

“And there was this guy. He had been dancing behind me for a few songs, and I hadn’t noticed. But then I- I felt his hand on my waist. At first I didn’t give it much notice because it was really crowded. Then he started touching more sensitive parts of my body.” Amy closes her eyes briefly as she relives the moment. She doesn’t notice the tears gathering in Jake’s eyes, or the way his fists clench angrily.

“I wanted to leave. I was already really uncomfortable by that time, but the music was too loud and everyone was so drunk they didn’t notice. He was just so close to me and his arms were wrapped around my waist tightly and I just couldn’t breathe. I needed space, but I couldn’t escape his grasp, and suddenly I just got reminded of-,” she stops suddenly, trying to gather herself for a moment. “I got reminded of _him_ ,” she finishes quietly.

“Who’s _him_?” Jake asks. When she doesn’t reply, he asks again. “Ames?”

“My ex-boyfriend,” Amy answers quietly. “It started off really great. I truly believed he was the one for me. But then one night I came home late. I had been out with some friends, and when I got home he was quite clearly drunk. There were plates and cups smashed and there were empty wine glasses on the table. He yelled at me and said he was worried sick. And then he,” her eyes fill with tears and Jake lays a hand on her shoulder comfortingly, willing her to continue.

“He beat me. Called me a slut. Screamed at me. I don’t even fully remember what happened that day but it was bad, Jake. I woke up the next day with scars all over my body,” she chokes out. “I lived in constant fear after that day. Always scared of what he would do to me. Then he started threatening my family and friends. I had to cut off almost all my ties with them.”

“Every time I did something wrong or something he didn’t like, he would take out the whip. Or sometimes even his belt. He would beat me until I was bleeding, or until I had passed out from all the pain. And the worst part is,” she says with a sob. “I didn’t even try to stop him. I just let him continue to abuse me. I was weak. I had given up. I wasn’t even alive anymore, just existing.”

She looks down. She can’t bear to see his expression. “I endured this for months. It got worse and worse. The threats, they got more and more serious. He threatened to kill my loved ones if I ever dared to leave. I couldn’t do that to them, so I stayed. I stayed by his side through everything.”

“Until one day I couldn’t take it anymore. He had just fallen asleep, and I took all my clothes and belongings and I left. I escaped. Once I was out of the door I ran. I ran all the way, not stopping until I reached my captain’s house. I told him everything that happened and he kept me in a safe house while the other detectives figured out what to do with him.”

“I stayed in that safe house for months. I couldn’t bring myself to leave, see my friends or family. I was too terrified of what he would do if he found out. Even after my captain told me they had already pressed charges against him, I never left. My nights were filled with nightmares and terror. I tried so hard to go back to normal. But I couldn’t. Every where I went I saw _him_. I decided then that I needed a fresh start. So I put in my transfer for the nine nine and moved to Brooklyn.”

“I didn’t think I was capable of loving again. I thought that was the end of love for me, and that I would wound up alone. But then I met you, Jake, and I knew I was wrong. You brought light to my world when it was dark, you kept me happy, and it was only after we started dating that I could finally put my past behind me. He was no longer a part of me anymore. So thank you. For bringing me back,” she finally finishes.

Silence fills the room. She can’t bring herself to look up at him. She’s almost certain this is going to be the moment he sees her for who she really is — pathetic and helpless. But then she looks up timidly, and there he is, hunched over and body shaking. _He’s crying,_ Amy realizes with a jolt, and in that moment her heart breaks, seeing him so upset.

“Jake,” she starts, reaching out to him, and then his arms are wrapped around her as he pulls her in tightly, sobbing into her hair.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispers over and over again, and then Amy’s crying again too because Jake hasn’t done anything wrong and he shouldn’t be apologizing. But she can’t bring herself to say anything so she just shakes her head as she clutches him tighter. Hoping he understands.

“Amy?” he asks after a while.

She nods.

“What happened in the end? At the bar?”

“Rosa stopped him. She figured out something was wrong after a while. She even punched the guy and threatened to slit his throat if he ever tried that again,” Amy replies with a small smile.

Jake chuckles. “I’m just glad you’re okay Ames. I love you.”

“Love you too.”

It’s funny how fast time passes when they’re wrapped up in each other’s arms. The world around them disappears and they’re alone, both out of tears now. She closes her eyes and leans her head against his chest, listening to his calm and steady breathing. And in that moment she knows she’s going to be safe. He’ll be there for her. No matter what.

——

Jake doesn’t realize she’s asleep until he hears the faint snores. He smiles to himself while removing his arms from around her, smoothing out the tangles in her now unruly hair. His heart is filled with affection and love as he lays her head on the soft pillows. Her chest is rising and falling steadily, her hair spilled over her shoulders. She looks so peaceful and serene and Jake leans down to press a kiss to her forehead.

“Goodnight Ames,” he whispers. “I love you so much.”

He changes out of his clothes and into his pajamas quickly, then he shuffles into the bed quietly, careful not to wake Amy. She’s still sound asleep, and Jake can’t help but reach over and stroke her tear-stained cheeks. It breaks his heart how someone can treat her this way, and just the thought of it fills him with indignation. He knows _he’s_ never going to hurt her in any way.

The sound of Amy’s soft snores fill the room again and Jake smiles down at her calm sleeping figure, his finger hovering over the light switch.

“I love you,” he whispers again.

And then he turns the light off.

**Author's Note:**

> hope you liked it!!! 💗


End file.
